The Next Exciting Installment of Safe Objects Injuring Ammon

So, today we look at playground equipment. A relic of past times, good playground equipment was great simply because of how absurdly dangerous it was. Rusty Metal Hinges, crumbling wood primed for splintering, and the See-Saws.

Oh See-saws. Perhaps only Merry-go-Rounds could rival the See-Saw in inherent danger. There was the chance of crushing your legs beneath the seat, you could slam your head into the bar, and there was no way to escape flying into the ground at multiple G's, making sitting an ordeal for the foreseeable future.

You don't see see-saws, or their northern counterpart the Teeter-Totter, much anymore. Like so many good things, Mr. Potato Head, Easy bake Ovens, Lawn Darts, repeated injuries and worried parents have been the end them. However, imagine my joy when we wound up a playground that still had classic See-saws. Not those pointless, spring loaded bouncy nonsense. Legitimate simple mechanics playground fun.

So last night we were playing on the See-Saws, and i was lighter than my friend (always an issue on See-Saws) so i was able to sit back without actually kicking off at all. So we were winding down, and i was essentially reclining, with my legs across the bars (there were two parallel bars) and my feet in between to keep me from falling.

When suddenly, one unfortunate bounce from the other side of the see-saw and a momentary loss of balance, and i found myself hanging from the see-saw, my calf wedged between the two bars and my weight crushing my shin. My friend on the other side tried to get me down, but panicking leaned back, holding me away just above the ground. I finally made it to the ground and checked myself out, and finding myself intact, was quite satisfied. That said, it feels like someone hit me in the shin with a 2x4, and then bashed the other side with a bar for good measure. So yeah, it's sort of hard to walk today.

In other news, today i learned how to change a car battery. Learned is maybe an exaggeration, it's pretty intuitive, so it's a bit like learning to change the batteries in anything, positive to positive and lefty-loosey. This did, however, have the added bonus of being filled with sulfuric acid, and the old battery had leaked acid all over the place where the battery goes. So after we had put it in to get the car back from the stake center i had to take the battery out, and clean out the case with liberal amounts of baking soda and water. It reminded me of Mr. Teske's science project back in the day, where we had to figure out how to deal with an acid spill in the reservoir. I also learned that when your wrench is the same length as the distance between the two terminals there are going to be problems if you're not careful.

So yeah, a pretty productive morning so far, i just found out that there's a mandatory evacuation order for us. We don't necessarily have to go all the way to jackson, we could just go to the other side of the interstate, but we'll see how it turns out. Anyway, i need breakfast. Ate Logo